Docile Stingrays

With all due respect to the man and his work, I really wonder what Steve Irvin did to piss off that stingray. I mean, the stingray is like the Nobel Peace Prize Winner of the animal kingdom. One could easily cite its killing of only seventeen men over all these millennia as symbolic of its acutely friendly nature. Only seventeen. Heck, I am sure more people have been killed by buffaloes falling from trees. To add some perspective, If I had a venomous tail, seventeen would be the number of people I’d whack on a Sabbath. But not the gentle stingray. It prefers to placidly lie around on the sea bed. Now, Irwin got a creature like that to put a hole in his heart. Yup, not the usual painful wound on heel, but a bloody puncture in a life sustaining organ. That, my friends, is one terribly pissed off stingray. I presume that with the stingray’s mouth and eyes being on opposite sides of its body, Irwin couldn’t resist a Stevie Wonder joke adaptation, especially since a healthy stingray’s mouth area looks like it has got a puncture mark or two around.

Irwin to Cameraman(markedly excited about the joke) : “Mate, here’s a good one, why does a stingray have puncture marks around its mouth?”

Cameraman(pretending he doesn’t know what’s coming and zooming in on the stingray beside Irwin): “Beats me Steve..”

Irwin: “‘Coz it eats with a fork. Hawhawhaw..”

WHACK!!!

Cameraman: “Uh oh..”